You might be here if:
You keep ending up in the same relationship dynamic with different people
The pattern is obvious to everyone but you - until someone names it
You've done therapy, read the books, know your patterns - and you're still repeating them
You suspect the problem isn't the specific person/job/situation - it's something in how YOU relate to everything
You're navigating coming out, transition, or identity reconstruction and all your relationships feel unstable
You left a relationship or structure that looked good on paper because it was dead in reality
You know you're complicit in creating the dynamic you're complaining about
Something about how you operate feels fundamentally misaligned with who you're becoming
You're ready to see what's actually true, not what's comfortable
What I'm not.
I'm not a therapist, psychologist, or mental health clinician. I don't diagnose, treat, or provide clinical care for mental health conditions.
If you're navigating active mental health diagnoses - depression, anxiety disorders, PTSD, bipolar, or anything requiring clinical support - I'm not the right person. You need someone with clinical training and credentials.
I'm also not here to provide crisis support or manage acute psychological distress. If you're in a mental health crisis, contact your GP, a registered psychologist, or Lifeline (13 11 14).
What I DO offer is transformation work for people who are fundamentally well but stuck - caught in patterns they can't break, running dynamics they can't see, ready to examine what they're complicit in creating.
If that's you, and you're ready to do the work - I'm here.
What I actually do.
I treat your relational patterns as a system, not a series of personal failures.
Most individual work focuses on helping you feel better or communicate better within your existing patterns. I show you the invisible structure you're operating inside - the inherited beliefs, the unconscious agreements, the power dynamics you're replicating without realising it.
I'm not asking "how can you cope better?" I'm asking: "What pattern are you running? Where did it come from? What's it protecting? And what would it take to actually change it?"
Examples:
You think the problem is that you're "too much" or "not enough." I show you the relational system that taught you to measure yourself that way - and what maintaining that belief protects you from examining.
You keep choosing partners who can't actually see you. I show you what you're getting from staying invisible and what it would cost to be chosen instead of kept.
You've left multiple relationships for the same reason. I show you the pattern you're bringing with you and what actually needs to change (hint: it's not finding a better person).
I find the one pattern creating all your problems.
People think they have separate "relationship problems," "work problems," "money problems," "family problems."
Usually, it's one pattern running all of them.
Examples:
You struggle with boundaries in romantic relationships AND can't say no to clients AND let family overstep constantly. That's not three separate problems. It's one belief about yourself expressing in three places.
You self-sabotage right before breakthrough in your business AND in intimate relationships AND in health goals. Same pattern, different stage.
You're attracted to emotionally unavailable partners AND chronically undercharge for your work AND have friendships where you give more than you receive. One pattern, multiple expressions.
I find that pattern. I show you what belief is running it. Then we change the belief - and watch the pattern dissolve everywhere at once.
I change the belief, not just the behaviour.
Change doesn't happen through willpower, "doing better," or behaviour modification.
It happens when you shift the belief creating the behaviour.
Examples:
Instead of "setting better boundaries" (performing), we shift the belief to something like "I'm whole without being needed." The boundaries follow naturally everywhere.
Instead of "being more confident" (surface level), we dismantle the belief that "Being powerful means being alone" or "Success makes me a target." Confidence becomes effortless once the belief supports it.
Instead of "learning to receive" (behavioural fix), we address why receiving feels dangerous. Then receiving becomes natural in relationships, money, recognition, support - everywhere.
What we work on.
Whatever pattern is keeping you stuck:
Romantic relationships:
Repetitive partner choices or dynamics
Intimacy avoidance or enmeshment
Boundaries, needs, desire, power dynamics
Examining being kept vs being chosen
Friendship patterns:
Over-giving or under-receiving
Difficulty maintaining closeness or appropriate distance
Repetitive dynamics (always the therapist, always the rescuer)
Friendships that require you to diminish yourself
Professional/work:
Chronic undercharging or under-earning
Visibility resistance or impostor patterns
Authority issues (with it or claiming it)
Success sabotage or ceiling-hitting
Team/colleague dynamics that repeat
Relationship to self:
Self-worth, self-trust, self-abandonment patterns
Internal critic or harsh self-judgment
Difficulty making decisions or trusting your knowing
Relationship to your body, needs, desires
Family/origin patterns:
Roles you can't escape (caretaker, scapegoat, hero)
Boundaries with parents, siblings, extended family
Inherited beliefs about money, success, relationships, worthiness
What you inherited vs what you're choosing
Money/success:
Chronic undercharging relative to skill/value
Fear of visibility or being seen
Success immediately followed by sabotage
Beliefs about what wealth means or costs
I articulate what you're complicit in creating.
Sometimes the pattern is salvageable and wants to evolve. Sometimes you've outgrown it entirely. Sometimes the structure you built for who you were at 25 doesn't fit who you're becoming at 40.
I'll tell you which one you're in - not to be cruel, but because clarity is kinder than false hope or prolonged denial.
Examples:
You keep dating people who need fixing because it lets you avoid examining what YOU actually want. The pattern worked when you were younger. It doesn't work now. Here's what changing it would actually require.
You're replicating the power dynamic from your family of origin - one person holds all the emotional labour and the other remains functionally dependent. This isn't about gender or identity, it's about an inherited structural pattern. It can be redesigned, but you have to see it first.
You came out/transitioned and now all your relationships feel unstable. You built them for a version of you that no longer exists. Some can evolve. Some can't. Here's how to tell the difference.
How we work together.
Step 1: Individual Assessment
45 minutes | $495 + GST
This is where we map your patterns - what you're caught in, what you're not seeing, where you keep getting stuck. We're looking at the system you're operating inside, not just the surface behaviours.
This session gives you clarity on what's actually happening and what needs to shift if you want something different.
The assessment is standalone - it doesn't come off your package if you decide to continue. You're paying for my time and analysis regardless of what happens next.
Step 2: Individual Transformation
5-Session Package: $1,875 + GST (paid upfront)
Five 45-minute sessions at $375 + GST each. This package is designed for people ready to do the work over time, with enough sessions to actually shift something rather than just talk about it.
Sessions must be used within 12 months of purchase.
After your initial package: We assess where you are and structure another commitment if you want to continue. Most people do.
Transformation work isn't built for one-off conversations. It takes time to actually shift a pattern rather than just understand it.
A note on confidentiality
The work I do happens behind closed doors. I don't use client names, photos, or identifiable details publicly - even with permission.
This isn't therapy Instagram where transformation gets performed for an audience. This is structural work that requires complete privacy to be effective.
The testimonials below are real, but anonymised. Because the people doing this work value discretion more than they value being a case study.
If you need public proof before you'll trust the process, we're not a fit. But if you understand that the best work happens when no one's watching - you're in the right place.
What clients say:
"I'd been in therapy for three years working on 'my relationship issues.' She showed me in one session that I didn't have three separate problems - I had one belief running all of them. Once we shifted that belief, the pattern dissolved everywhere at once. My romantic relationships, my friendships, how I show up at work - everything changed."
"After I came out, every relationship in my life felt scary. She showed me which relationships were built for the old version of me and which ones could evolve. Some ended. Some transformed. The clarity was painful but necessary. I'm not trying to fit into structures that were never built for me anymore."
"She told me I was choosing emotionally unavailable partners because being seen terrified me more than being lonely. I wanted to argue with her. She was right. We dismantled that belief and suddenly I could actually receive someone who wanted to choose me. It wasn't about finding better people - it was about becoming available to be chosen."
"I kept sabotaging success right before breakthrough - in my business, in relationships, everywhere. She showed me I had an unconscious belief that being visible was dangerous. We dismantled it. Now I can actually receive what I've built instead of destroying it the moment it gets real."
"I thought I had a boundary problem. She showed me I had a worthiness problem. I believed I was only valuable when I was needed, so I kept over-giving everywhere - relationships, work, friendships, family. Once we changed that core belief, boundaries became effortless. I didn't have to perform them anymore."
"She named a pattern I'd been running for 20 years that no one had ever articulated. Not 'you have commitment issues' - the actual structural belief underneath it. Once I could see it, I couldn't keep running it unconsciously. That's when everything shifted."